all growed up

I would like to take this opportunity to send birthday wishes to my dearest friend, Angel:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOU OLD, PSYCHO BITCH!! You're still the bestest best friend ever... even after 15 long, torturous years!

Have a glorious day. Smile profusely. And I will see you Friday. Long live the Kola Kult. Love ya!!

latoyia figueroa

As the media swarms over Aruba, broadcasting the details of the Natalee Holloway investigation into homes across America, let's take some time to remember that not everyone who turns up missing is white, blonde, and well-heeled. In Philadelphia a seven-year old girl wonders what happened to her mother, Latoyia Figueroa, who disappeared on July 18. Making this case more urgent is the fact that Latoyia is also seven months pregnant. Yet there has been little coverage outside of Philly. Though this story is finally getting more exposure thanks to The All Spin Zone and others, more needs to be done to spread the word and build the buzz. Passing on this information--whether through email or the water cooler-- is all it takes. For more information click on the above link. We all deserve to be found!

post-run inspiration

How appropriate that my birth name should have something to do with dark water:

You are elegant, withdrawn, and brilliant. Your mind is a weapon, able to solve any puzzle. You are also great at poking holes in arguments and common beliefs. For you, comfort and calm are very important. You tend to thrive on your own and shrug off most affection. You prefer to protect your emotions and stay strong.

The World's Shortest Personality Test

today i'm just going to ramble for a moment for that is all i'm capable of...

I awoke so late as to be vulgar--11:30--reeling from the third sugar hangover in as many days. Stumbling into the kitchen--no coffee of, course--I reached for the hair of the dog: ice cream and pie for brunch. "This is ridiculous. I'm going to be hating life later," I thought, woofing down the last creamy morsel of peanut butter mixed with whipped topping. With a sigh of submission, I prepared a veggie turkey sandwich and attempted to satisfy my body's nutritional needs, not to mention rein in my blood's glucose roller coaster ride.

Shit! I feel like shit!

My body's a wreck. My mind's on three planets at once. I'm bored, I'm lonely, I'm lazy, and life seems a little bit scarier right now. There's only one thing to do:

I decided to go for a run.

Running has always been the only sport I could do. I ran track and cross-country as a kid and often come back to it when feeling the need to get fit. But it's been a hell of a long time. My poor lungs! Yes, I quite smoking seven months ago but what about the 12 years before when my body suffered through nearly 20 bouts of oxygen-deprivation day in, day out? And MP (fka Boyfriend) and I have been avoiding the gym lately... I'm mushy! And my diet? What about all of my sugar-binging of late? Does my body have what it needs to endure a prolonged cardiac activity or will I shut down the way those Gatorade commercials tell me I will if I don't have the right amount of electrolytes? And it's hot and sunny. It claims to be only 70 but this is Portland. When the sun is out you might as well add another 15 degrees to the thermometer (I have yet to understand this climatological phenomenon). I miss snow!!

And there I was at Duniway Park. Very Portlandy considering this particular state-of-the-art track was made out of recycled tires and soles from Nike running shoes. I take a big glug of water and start... nice and slow... only gonna force two miles on myself... nice and steady... keep the pace... 1... this isn't so bad... 2... breathing harder... 3... I figured I'd get a little cramp, just keep the pace... one mile, doing good... 5... my body hurts... 6... almost there... 7... and there I go pretending like it's my track heyday (which was in grade school, mind you) and break out like a proverbial bat... 8, two miles, I think I'm going to die.

I head for home. My side is cursing me in five languages. My legs have switched from pie to Jell-O. My stomach is threatening to clean house. And I keep running into people. College kids and progressive couples with strollers the size of Mini Coopers. This is very annoying to me at this moment. I'm crossing through Portland State University and there's some sort of fair going on. There also seem to be a lot of newbies around (perhaps they're wanna-be singers here for the Bel Canto Northwest Vocal Institute... ok, I admit it, I envy them). This is evident by the large amount of people waiting a good 15 minutes for the Streetcar. As the destined-to-be-resurrected adage goes, "if you want to go to Nob Hill, hop the Streetcar; if you want to get there quickly, walk." (What's worse is they're probably only going two stops to the library.) It's not that I have anything against 13-21 year olds, it's just that I rolled my eyes at high school kids when I was in high school.

I'm home now. Not so hot anymore. My cramp went away. My legs have accepted their inevitable veganism. My stomach is relaxed. I am relaxed. My mind is clear. I can handle the newfound scariness. I was planning on going to a coffehouse and acting all bohemian but I think I may waste the afternoon away watching Connie & Carla. That's ok, right?

And as for my body? I feel ok now but I really need to lay off the sugar.

And maybe go running more.

here we meme again

This has been passed on to me by Underdog. Enjoy! (And don't be thinkin' you know me any better jus' cause you done read it!!)

10 years ago: July 1995... I was stuck living with my parents in Miamisburg, Ohio after having spent several months living in, first, Philadelphia and, later, with Angel. My days were spent working at the University of Dayton's Roesch Library. Come nightfall, my underage ass hit the dive bars with my (still) dear friend Mosa. Only a month until the big 2-1!

5 years ago: July 2000... I was taking summer classes at Valparaiso University and rehearsing for Fiddler on the Roof at the Memorial Opera House in town, my big return to the stage after a several years absence. To make ends meet I was a deli clerk at the local Wiseway. Consequently, I ate all sorts of exotic, non-kosher lunch meat that summer.

1 year ago: July 2004... Homelessness. Unemployment. Ick! Thank God for Boyfriend!!

Yesterday: 8 July 2005... Put in a full day at my fabulous job; It rained all evening (which they tell me is inappropriate for Portland at this time of year); Boyfriend and I had a big, homemade spaghetti dinner and chilled the night away.

Today: 9 July 2005... Slept in (8:30 here I come); Met Boyfriend for lunch (he had to work today); Dropped off a resume in my ongoing, half-assed quest for a second job; Currently chatting with Angel (how long have I known this woman??); Tonight, I may catch Othello in the park.

Tomorrow: is another day, but there will probably be a Sunday paper involved.

5 snacks I enjoy: Sour Patch Kids; ShockTarts; Fritos and cottage cheese; mango sorbet; kim chee.

5 bands that I know the lyrics of most of their songs: Siouxsie and the Banshees; Rasputina; B-52s; and because musicals should count, Sweeney Todd and A New Brain.

5 things I would do with $100,000,000: Get the fuck out of debt; put my folks up real good; make a very comfortable home-base for myself in NYC and then travel to my heart's content; invest, invest, invest; set up a charitable foundation.

5 locations I'd like to run away to: NYC; Ireland; Russia; Alaska; New England.

5 bad habits I have: I can be a real perfectionist (wait, this isn't a job interview, scratch that). It's a wonder I have any nails left; since I cut down the drinking my sweet tooth has taken over my life; I'm lazy; I can be, at times, a know-it-all, I guess if you want to call it that; I'm terribly indecisive. (Well, shit! Thank God I'm cute!)

5 things I like doing: singing; listening to music; creating beauty; walking about new places; reading.

5 things I would never wear: a thong; tapered pants; pigeon shit; underwear from goodwill; my older brother's hand-me-downs.

5 TV shows I like: The Simpsons; Family Guy; Antiques Roadshow; the News; um, um, um... I admit it... I don't paricularly watch that much television.

5 movies I like: Saved; Connie & Carla; On Edge; D.E.B.S.; Baby Boom.

5 famous people I'd like to meet: Elie Wiesel; Stephen Sondheim; Bill Clinton; Madonna; Siouxsie Sioux.

5 biggest joys of the moment: non-alcoholic beer; friends; walking in the West Hills; the kids flipping out on each other; my special pickle.

5 favorite toys: my teddy bear; bubbles; stickers; my beach cruiser; the crutches at work.

5 people to tag: this is a trick question, right? I pick Angel and Stef.

Thank you and good night.

let's celebrate our freedom & independence...

...while we still have it!

Have joyously liberal fourth!

i'm it!

My best friend, Angel, has deemed it necessary to "tag" me with one of those "memes" that are all the rage in the blogosphere. After conferring with her about what exactly it is I am supposed to do with it, here is my reply:

1) Number of books I own... 40-50 on hand, but another 300 or so in storage back in Ohio.

2) Last book I bought... Ishmael by Daniel Quinn. But, of course, I haven't read it yet.

3) Last book I read... Gilgamesh: A New English Version by Stephen Mitchell. I currently feel the need, inherent--at some time or another--in all persons with an English degree, to catch up on The Klassix.

4) Five books that mean a lot to me... I'm guessing here, but: Guess How Much I Love You by Sam McBratney with illustrations by Anita Jeram, Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse, Anthem by Ayn Rand, my mother's old pre-Vatican II St. Joseph's Missal in Latin and English that I used to play priest with as a youngin', and the pseudo-memoir I've been working on for over a year that I may or may not finish that shares a title with this blog.

Golly Gee! That was fun! I now tag Stef as she is the only other blogger I know. The meme is in your court.

the sensual courthouse

All rise for the Honorable Judge... Rockmyworld...

[P-Funk riffs play in the background.]

Sometimes, for work...

(Jackets and sport coats slide down long, toned Polo Ralph Lauren arms. As for the ladies? Well, you can keep that Chanel on for now--I won't tell anyone it's really JC Penney.)

...I have to run documents to the courthouse...

(Belts break free. Shoes go flying. Hair is unleashed in a whip as forceful as any Herbal Essence commercial.)

...And in this kooky post-9/11, judge-stalking world...

(Cellphones, jewels, bracelets pile up. Pens with metal nubs escape from hidden zippered locales.)

...the ubiquitous metal detector has made the practice of law...

[Rythms build to fortissimo in a glorious explosion of funky grooves... is that George Clinton I hear?]

...a whole lot sexier!

"Oh, Judge! Is that a chain on your wallet or are you just into... hung juries??"

(All that's missing is a wind machine.)